Daily Reflections
August 31
A UNIQUE PROGRAM
Alcoholics Anonymous will never have a professional class. We have gained some understanding of the ancient words “Freely ye have received, freely give.” We have discovered that at the point of professionalism, money and spirituality do not mix.
-TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 166
I believe that Alcoholics Anonymous stands alone in the treatment of alcoholism because it is based solely on the principle of one alcoholic sharing with another alcoholic. This is what makes the program unique. When I decided that I wanted to stay sober, I called a woman who I knew was a sober member of A.A., and she carried the message of Alcoholics Anonymous to me. She received no monetary compensation, but rather was paid by staying sober another day herself. Today I could ask for no payment other than another day free from alcohol, so in that respect, I am generously paid for my labor.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
August 31
A.A. Thought For The Day
“Call on new prospects while they are still jittery. They may be more receptive when depressed. See them alone if possible. Tell them enough about your drinking habits and experiences to encourage them to speak of themselves. If they wish to talk, let them do so. If they are not communicative, talk about the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture. When they see you know all about the drinking game, commence to describe yourself as an alcoholic and tell them how you learned you were sick.” Am I ready to talk about myself to new prospects?
Meditation For The Day
Try not to give way to criticism, blame, scorn, or judgment of others, when you are trying to help them. Effectiveness in helping others depends on controlling yourself. You may be swept away by a temporary natural urge to criticize or blame, unless you keep a tight rein on your emotions. You should have a firm foundation of spiritual living which makes you truly humble, if you are going to really help other people. Go easy on them and be hard on yourself. That is the way you can be used most to uplift a despairing spirit. And seek no personal recognition for what you are used by God to accomplish.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to avoid judgment and criticism. I pray that I may always try to build up others instead of tearing them down.
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As Bill Sees It
August 31
Let Go Absolutely, p.242
After failure on my part to dry up any drunks, Dr. Silkworth reminded me of Professor William James’s observation that truly transforming spiritual experiences are nearly always founded on calamity and collapse. “Stop preaching at them,” Dr. Silkworth said, “and give them the hard medical facts first. This may soften them up at depth so that they will be willing to do anything to get well. Then they may accept those spiritual ideas of yours, and even a Higher Power.”
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We beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas, and the result was nil–until we let go absolutely.
1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.13
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.58
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Walk In Dry Places
August 31
HONESTY IS NOT ENOUGH
Action AA tells us that we must be honest about our problems if we hope to overcome them.
Some people seem quite w11ling to do this. But an honest admission alone does not solve our problems. We have to go beyond honesty by taking needed action to correct what’s wrong in our lives.
For example, we would not believe that any- thing had been corrected simply because a doctor diagnosed a physical problem. We know that such diagnosis is only a preliminary step that must lead to treatment to be effective. In the same way, an honest admission of our alcoholism does not lead to sobriety unless we take further action to ad- dress the problem.
We should also be careful about becoming prideful in announcing our shortcomings. If we are recovering from alcoholism but excuse a bad temper as one of our “alcoholic defects,” are we attempting to correct our behavior? The more prideful we are about any fault, the more difficult it will be to change it.
Having become honest about my shortcomings, I’ll look for opportunities today to make needed corrections in my behavior. If I find myself using my “alcoholic nature” as an excuse for unacceptable behavior, I’ll take action to do something about it.
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Xtra Thoughts
August 31
Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate.
–Dr. Albert Schweitzer (1875 – 1965)
Funny thing about kindness. The more it’s used, the more you have of it.
–unknown
Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if you’re alive, it isn’t.
–Richard Bach
Apologizing with words isn’t the same thing as apologizing with actions.
–Laura J.
You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips.
–Oliver Goldsmith
“A hundredload of worry will not pay an ounce of debt.”
–George Herbert
“Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.”
–Condorcet
“One had to take some action against fear when once it laid hold of one.”
–Rainer Maria Rilke
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Father Leo’s Daily Meditation
August 31
STYLE
“Style is the man himself.”
– Georges Louis Leclerc de Buffon
Style is involved in Spirituality — especially when it concerns the recovering addict. Sobriety and serenity are not just seen in what we say or do or in our ability to keep away from the first drink or pill — they are seen in our creative styles. How we feel about ourselves should be seen in the confidence of our gait and the concern for personal appearance. Personal hygiene is important because it reflects a love of self. Physical health and exercise reveal a desire and interest in life, fitness and energy.
Style may not make the man but it certainly reveals the man!
May I seek to reveal the beauty You gave me with my appearance and style.
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Bible Scriptures
August 31
Our help is in the name of the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
-Psalm 124 : 8
Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
-Psalm 51:10
“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
-I Thessalonians 5:16-18
“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
-Matthew 18:3-4
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
-James 1:2-4
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Daily Inspiration
August 31
Worry gets in the way of getting what you really want. Lord, help me use my time in ways to enrich my life rather than focusing on things I can do nothing about anyway.
Great things happen when you believe and pray. Lord, grant me an amazing faith in life and the strength to meet its challenges.
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Elder’s Meditation of the Day
August 31
“Our Creator makes available to us all that we need.
It is an honor to go out and gather it.
We must remember to say ‘Thank You.’
It is honorable to give away, to show our gratitude… and to let the children see this.”
–Barney Bush, SHAWNEE
So many times we forget to say “thank You” to the Creator. He made for us an abundant universe. He built the Mother Earth to reproduce plenty of everything. It is an honor to be a part of the Great Spirit’s world. The Creator always gives us what we need. When we are given things, we should be willing to share it with others. Whenever we give to others, this makes us feel good inside. The more we give, the better we feel. The better we feel, the more we want to give. We need to teach this to our children. The children learn by our behavior.
My Creator, thank you for today. Thank you for the sun. Thank you for the earth. Thank you for my life. Thank you for …
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Journey To The Heart
August 31
What Would Feel Good to You?
What do you want? What would feel good to you? Ask yourself that question often as you go through your day, as you live your life.
When you don’t know what to do next, when you’re not sure how to find the path that’s right for you, ask yourself what you want and what would feel good. That’s how you’ll discover what’s right for you.
What energizes you? Which friends feel good to be around? What work excites you, infuses you with passion? Which hobbies interest you? How do you want to spend your time? We have endured have long enough. We have pushed ourselves through should too many times. There is a better and different way.
Learn to recognize what lifts your spirits. Become conscious of not only what you need, but also what you want and like, what feels right to you. At first, doing what you want and what feels good to you may be uncomfortable, especially if you’ve spent much of your life doing what doesn’t feel good to you. Learn to be comfortable with the new energy. Learn to become comfortable choosing what energizes you. By following your heart, by following your passion, you will find your path and you will find joy.
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A Day At A Time
August 31
Reflection For The Day
From time to time, I begin to think I know what God’s will is for other people, I say to myself, “This person ought to be cured of his terminal illness,” or “That one ought to be freed from the torment she’s going through,” and I begin to pray for those specific things. My heart is in the right place when I pray in such fashion, but those prayers are based on the supposition that I know God’s will for the person for whom I pray, I out to pray that God’s will — whatever it is — be done for others as well as for myself. Will I remember that God is ready to befriend me, but only to the degree that I trust him?
Today I Pray
I praise God for the chance to help others. I thank God also for making me want to help others, for taking me out of my tower of self so that I can meet and share with and care about people. “Teach me to pray that “Thy Will be done” in the spirit of love, which God inspires in me.
Today I Pray
I will put my trust in the will of God.
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One More Day
August 31
A mature person is one who does not think only in absolutes, who is able to be objective even when deeply stirred emotionally …
– Eleanor Roosevelt
Many of us are will aware of how easily tempers flare or tears can flow when we face an unexpected problem or situation. Perhaps illness contributes to this sensitivity, but we might also consider whether we’ve become more rigid. Are we holding too tightly to absolutes, wanting to have almost everything? Has coping with unpredictable illnesses driven us to seek predictability in other areas of our lives?
Maturity often means letting go of the need to control. We also find greater peace by allowing ourselves to be unprepared for people and events we can’t prepare for. There are no absolutes, and we don’t have to live as though there were.
I will be willing to consider new ideas.
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One Day At A Time
August 31
SERVICE
“Ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country.”
–John Fitzgerald Kennedy
At one of the first program functions I ever attended, there were a large number of pots and pans that needed to be washed in the kitchen. My sponsor told me that we were going to go in there and wash all those dirty pans. When I asked why, she said, “Because this stuff keeps us abstinent.” That was good enough for me. Service is essential to my recovery. As our primary purpose states, “we carry the message to the compulsive overeater who still suffers.” The essence of my program is that of committing to service.
Since then my service in program has been of paramount importance to me, so I sponsor and serve at the group and Intergroup levels, I attend all events I can, and I am in service at most of the meetings I attend. I encourage sponsees to serve their fellow sufferers also and ask them to sponsor newcomers as soon as they have worked Steps One through Three. This action gets them working on Step Four as well.
One of my favorite ways to give service is to be available to talk to newcomers by telephone. As our responsibility pledge states, “Always to lend the heart and hand to all who share my compulsion, for this I am responsible.” A commitment to service is as vital to my recovery as are my commitments to abstinence, working the Steps and a daily food plan. These components mesh together and give me purpose I never had before.
One Day at a Time …
I will find a way to be helpful to others in program.
~ Jill C.
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Today’s Gift
August 31
I’m a trader at heart … except that I don’t like trades that come out equally–that’s too much like borrowing. I’d rather trade a strong hand for a patient ear or a story for a meal: anything that keeps things turning over.
Gordon Bok
There is an old saying that there are just two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. Those of us who are givers delight in it. We have a buck to lend when someone is broke, a kind word when they’re down, a helping hand when they need it. But sometimes we givers are uncomfortable when we’re on the receiving end. We brush off thanks and gifts and help, even when they’re needed or deserved.
Those of us who are takers, on the other hand, know how to receive graciously what others have to give; we know how to ask for what we need. Often, however, we don’t know how to give. We may be afraid our gifts will be wrong or rejected or laughed at.
We can all strive to become traders, people who have learned how to both give and receive. We each have the capacity to give what we have freely and to ask, gratefully, for what we don’t have. That is the greatest gift of all.
What can I give and take today?
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The Language of Letting Go
August 31
Denial
I’ve been recovering many years. I’ve used denial many times. It has been a defense, a survival device, a coping behavior, and, at times, almost my undoing. It has been both a friend and an enemy.
When I was a child, I used denial to protect my family and myself. I protected myself from seeing things too painful to see and feelings too overwhelming to feel. Denial got me safely through many traumatic situations, when I had no other resources for survival.
The negative aspect of using denial was that I lost touch with my feelings and myself. I became able to participate in harmful situations without even knowing I was hurting. I was able to tolerate a great deal of pain and abuse without the foggiest notion it was abnormal.
I learned to participate in my own abuse.
Denial protected me from pain, but it also rendered me blind to my feelings, my needs, and myself. It was like a thick blanket that covered and smothered me.
Eventually, I began to recover. I had a glimpse of awareness about my pain, my feelings, and my behaviors. I began to see myself, and the world, as we were. There was so much denial from my past that had the blanket been entirely ripped from me. I would have died from the shock of exposure. I needed to embrace insights, remembrances, awareness, and healing gently, gradually.
Life participated in this process with me. It is a gentle teacher. As I recovered, I was brought to the incidents and people I needed in order to remind me of what I was still denying, to tell me where I required more healing from my past, as I could handle these insights.
I still use, and break through, denial–as needed. When the winds of change blow through, upsetting a familiar structure and preparing me for the new, I pick up my blanket and hide, for a while. Sometimes, when someone I love has a problem, I hide under the blanket, momentarily. Memories emerge of things denied, memories that need to be remembered, felt, and accepted so I can continue to become healed – strong and healthy.
Sometimes, I feel ashamed about how long it takes me to struggle through to acceptance of reality. I feel embarrassed when I find myself again clouded by the fog of denial.
Then something happens, and I see that I am moving forward. The experience was necessary, connected, not at all a mistake, but an important part of healing.
It’s an exciting process, this journey called recovery, but I understand I may sometimes use denial to help me get through the rough spots. I’m also aware that denial is a friend, and an enemy. I’m on the alert for danger signs: those cloudy, confused feelings … sluggish energy … feeling compulsive … running too fast or hard … avoiding support mechanisms.
I’ve gained a healthy respect for our need to use denial as a blanket to wrap ourselves in when we become too cold. It isn’t my job to run around ripping people’s blankets off or shaming others for using the blanket. Shaming makes them colder, makes them wrap themselves more tightly in the blanket. Yanking their blanket away is dangerous. They could die of exposure, the same way I could have.
I’ve learned the best thing I can do around people who are wrapped in this blanket is to make them feel warm and safe. The warmer and safer they feel, the more able they are to drop their blanket. I don’t have to support or encourage their denial. I can be direct. If others are in denial about a particular thing, and their activity is harmful to me, I don’t have to be around them. I can wish them will and take care of myself. You see, if I stand too long around someone who is harming me, I will inevitably pick up my blanket again.
I tend to be attracted to warm people. When I’m around warm people, I don’t need to use my blanket.
I’ve gained respect for creating warm environments, where blankets are not needed, or at least not needed for long. I’ve gained trust in the way people heal from and deal with life.
God, help me be open to and trust the process that is healing me from all I have denied from my past. Help me strive for awareness and acceptance, but also help me practice gentleness and compassion for myself–and others–for those times I have used denial.
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More Language Of Letting Go
August 31
Be a good guest
Guests come and go at the Blue Sky Lodge. Sometimes a sky diver comes to the drop zone for the weekend from a nearby town and needs a place to shower and sleep for one evening. Often, people come from around the world to train and jump at Skydive Elsinore, and it is a particular pleasure to offer our international friends a bed, showers, and the amenities of the Lodge.
Martin was one such guest.
After spending years in the military, he decided to have some fun with what he had learned. He now recruits skydiving trainees from the United Kingdom and plans training excursions at Lake Elsinore, staying for several weeks at a time. He frequently brings his wife with him, but occasionally comes here alone. On one such solo visit, we invited him to stay at the Blue Sky Lodge and were thrilled when he accepted our invitation.
All Blue Sky Lodge guests are told the same thing: Make yourself at home. The pool, hot tub, miniature golf course, DVD player, stereo, showers, food, beverages, books, prayer room, stunning mountain view, musical instruments, and contents of the refrigerator are here for your enjoyment. Help yourself!
“Martin was a good guest,” Chip commented recently. “He swam, used the hot tub, ran, and sat outside and enjoyed the view.”
I agreed. It gave us both pleasure to see Martin make himself at home and enjoy the gifts the Lodge has to offer. He was respectful and grateful– a delightful humble air– but he was also confident, and confidently enjoyed the pleasures and gifts available and offered to him.
What kind of a guest are you? Are you making yourself at home on this planet, whatever the circumstances you find yourself in? Are you taking delight and pleasure in the gifts and moments available to you, each day? Or are you sitting uncomfortably on the edge of a straight-backed chair, wondering if it’s okay to help yourself?
We each have different gifts and pleasures available to us at any given time in our lives. Sometimes, we have to look to see what these gifts are. The pleasures may be as simple as a view of an old oak tree from our kitchen window, a big bath tub that fills up with hot water and comforts our body and soul, or a walk around the city block surrounding the apartment we rent.
Sometimes, the best way to say thanks is to simply enjoy with humble confidence the gifts and pleasures that are offered to us today.
Are you a good guest? Make yourself at home. It’s your world,too.
God, teach me how to enjoy and savor the pleasures, gifts, and talents that are spread out before me. Help me learn to make myself at home, wherever I find myself today.
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Touchstones Meditations For Men
August 31
In the world to come they will not ask me, “Why were you not Moses?” They will ask me, “Why were you not Zusya?”
—Zusya of Hanipoli
We grow in the direction of the choices we make. That growth depends as much on how we make decisions as on which ones we make. Often in the past we tried to model ourselves after someone we admired. Our self-confidence was poor, so we depended on others to let us know if our decisions were correct, or we modeled our decisions on how we thought others would decide. Now we see that we can never become exactly like someone else and we need not try.
To each of us, God gives a creative task and a problem – to take our special abilities and limitations and become whole men. We use standards for our choices based on our best ideas of right and wrong, of what fits with our inner feelings, and of what our Higher Power is guiding us toward. Unfinished and imperfect as we are, we become more peaceful as we become more fully ourselves.
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Daily TAO
August 31
Dialogue
I still talk in my sleep.
I still dream.
How can there be perfect stillness
When my brain’s so noisy?
We carry on a constant dialogue within ourselves. This is the origin of our problems.
The very word dialogue means talking between two sides. We could not have an inner dialogue unless there was a split in our minds. We all have two sides; as long as they are not united, we cannot attain the wholeness that spirituality requires.
Even with years of self-cultivation, it is not easy to tame the wild mind. One might appear to have attained perfect control in all waking situations, only to find endless turbulence during meditation and sleep. This is a sign of incomplete attainment. Perfection must be total.
The process of perfection is long and must be methodical. Although our efforts must be to the utmost, we must never risk repressing ourselves. Indeed, rather than shutting away the unpleasant or unruly aspects of ourselves, we must take them all out and examine them. Daily introspection brings harmony to all our facets. Those aspects that are bad can be dissolved. Those that are of advantage can be cultivated. This effort will take many years, but in this gradual way, we resolve ourselves with our subconscious mind and free ourselves from struggle and conflict.
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Daily Zen
August 31
I made friends with the white clouds
And grey storks
Who gently reply to the fresh wind
And the bright moon.
Unaffected by the passage of time
I remain bright and quiet while I sit.
A bowl of porridge,
A plate of wild greens,
And a cup of tea:
I smile
– Kusan Sunim (1909-1983)
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Food For Thought
August 31
Accepting Guidelines
Some of us have gone through life thinking that we did not need to follow any guidelines. Somehow, we got the idea that special circumstances placed us above the rules. We looked for shortcuts and rebelled against the tedium of discipline. Considering ourselves exceptional, we decided to make our own guidelines. These were usually based on doing what we felt like when we felt like it.
When we get to OA, we may spend a short or a long time experimenting with the program, adjusting it to suit ourselves. Sooner or later, we discover that our adjustments do not work. The OA program works, provided we follow the rules and work it as it is, not as we might like it to be.
Once we accept the rules at a gut level, they lead us out of negative restraint into positive freedom. By following a few simple guidelines, we become free from slavery to compulsive overeating and self-centered confusion.
Thank You for Your guidelines.
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Faith’s Check Book
August 31
Divine, Ever-Living, Unchanging
But the word of the Lord endureth for ever. And this is the word which by the gospel is preached unto you.
-1 Peter 1:25
All human teaching and, indeed, all human beings shall pass away as the grass of the meadow; but we are here assured that the Word of the Lord is of a very different character, for it shall endure forever.
We have here a divine gospel; for what word can endure forever but that which is spoken by the eternal God?
We have here an ever-living gospel, as full of vitality as when it first came from the lips of God; as strong to convince and convert, to regenerate and console, to sustain and sanctify as ever it was in its first days of wonder-working.
We have an unchanging gospel which is not today green grass and tomorrow dry hay but always the abiding truth of the immutable Jehovah. Opinions alter, but truth certified by God can no more change than the God who uttered it.
Here, then, we have a gospel to rejoice in, a word of the Lord upon which we may lean all our weight. “For ever” includes life, death, judgment, and eternity. Glory be to God in Christ Jesus for everlasting consolation. Feed on the word today and all the days of thy life.
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This Morning’s Readings
August 31
“On mine arm shall they trust.”
—Isaiah 51:5
IN seasons of severe trial, the Christian has nothing on earth that he can trust to, and is therefore compelled to cast himself on his God alone. When his vessel is on its beam-ends, and no human deliverance can avail, he must simply and entirely trust himself to the providence and care of God. Happy storm that wrecks a man on such a rock as this! O blessed hurricane that drives the soul to God and God alone! There is no getting at our God sometimes because of the multitude of our friends; but when a man is so poor, so friendless, so helpless that he has nowhere else to turn, he flies into his Father’s arms, and is blessedly clasped therein! When he is burdened with troubles so pressing and so peculiar, that he cannot tell them to any but his God, he may be thankful for them; for he will learn more of his Lord then than at any other time. Oh, tempest-tossed believer, it is a happy trouble that drives thee to thy Father! Now that thou hast only thy God to trust to, see that thou puttest thy full confidence in Him. Dishonour not thy Lord and Master by unworthy doubts and fears; but be strong in faith, giving glory to God. Show the world that thy God is worth ten thousand worlds to thee. Show rich men how rich thou art in thy poverty when the Lord God is thy helper. Show the strong man how strong thou art in thy weakness when underneath thee are the everlasting arms. Now is the time for feats of faith and valiant exploits. Be strong and very courageous, and the Lord thy God shall certainly, as surely as He built the heavens and the earth, glorify Himself in thy weakness, and magnify his might in the midst of thy distress. The grandeur of the arch of heaven would be spoiled if the sky were supported by a single visible column, and your faith would lose its glory if it rested on anything discernible by the carnal eye. May the Holy Spirit give you to rest in Jesus this closing day of the month.
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This Evening’s Readings
August 31
“If we walk in the light, as He is in the light.”
—1 John 1:7
AS He is in the light! Can we ever attain to this? Shall we ever be able to walk as clearly in the light as He is whom we call “Our Father,” of whom it is written, “God is light, and in Him is no darkness at all”? Certainly, this is the model which it set before us, for the Saviour Himself said, “Be ye perfect, even as your Father who is in heaven is perfect”; and although we may feel that we can never rival the perfection of God, yet we are to seek after it, and never to be satisfied until we attain to it. The youthful artist, as he grasps his early pencil, can hardly hope to equal Raphael or Michael Angelo, but still, if he did not have a noble beau ideal before his mind, he would only attain to something very mean and ordinary. But what is meant by the expression that the Christian is to walk in light as God is in the light? We conceive it to import likeness, but not degree. We are as truly in the light, we are as heartily in the light, we are as sincerely in the light, as honestly in the light, though we cannot be there in the same measure. I cannot dwell in the sun, it is too bright a place for my residence, but I can walk in the light of the sun; and so, though I cannot attain to that perfection of purity and truth which belongs to the Lord of hosts by nature as the infinitely good, yet I can set the Lord always before me, and strive, by the help of the indwelling Spirit, after conformity to His image. That famous old commentator, John Trapp, says, “We may be in the light as God is in the light for quality, but not for equality.” We are to have the same light, and are as truly to have it and walk in it as God does, though, as for equality with God in His holiness and purity, that must be left until we cross the Jordan and enter into the perfection of the Most High. Mark that the blessings of sacred fellowship and perfect cleansing are bound up with walking in the light.