Daily Reflections
April 15
THE BONDAGE OF RESENTMENTS
… harboring resentment is infinitely grave. For then we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the spirit.
–AS BILL SEES IT, p. 5
It has been said, “Anger is a luxury I cannot afford.” Does this suggest I ignore this human emotion? I believe not. Before I learned of the A.A. program, I was a slave to the behavior patterns of alcoholism. I was chained to negativity, with no hope of cutting loose.
The Steps offered me an alternative. Step Four was the beginning of the end of my bondage. The process of “letting go” started with an inventory. I needed not be frightened, for the previous Steps assured me I was not alone. My Higher Power led me to this door and gave me the gift of choice. Today I can choose to open the door to freedom and rejoice in the sunlight of the Steps, as they cleanse the spirit within me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
April 15
A.A. Thought For The Day
Terrible things could have happened to any one of us. We never will know what might have happened to us when we were drunk. We usually thought: “That couldn’t happen to me.” But any one of us could have killed somebody or have been killed ourselves, if we were drunk enough. But fear of these things never kept us from drinking. Do I believe that in A.A. we have something more effective than fear?
Meditation For The Day
I must keep calm and unmoved in the vicissitudes of life. I must go back into the silence of communion with God to recover this calm when it is lost even for one moment. I will accomplish more by this calmness than by all the activities of a long day. At all cost I will keep calm. I can solve nothing when I am agitated. I should keep away from things that are upsetting emotionally. I should run on an even keel and not get tipped over by emotional upsets. I should seek for things that are calm and good and true and stick to those things.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not argue nor contend, but merely state calmly what I believe to be true. I pray that I may keep myself in that state of calmness that comes from faith in God’s purpose for the world.
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As Bill Sees It
April 15
Move Ahead, p. 105
To spend too much time on any one alcoholic is to deny some other an opportunity to live and be happy. One of our Fellowship failed entirely with his first half-dozen prospects. He often says that if he had continued to work on them, he might have deprived many others, who have since recovered, of their chance.
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“Our chief responsibility to the newcomer is an adequate presentation of the program. If he does nothing or argues, we do nothing but maintain our own sobriety. If he starts to move ahead, even a little, with an open mind, we then break our necks to help in every way we can.”
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 96
2. Letter, 1942
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Walk in Dry Places
April 15
When Things are Not humanly possible.
Facing Difficulties
We’re reminded again and again that “No human power could have relieved our alcoholism.” Whatever it is that keeps us sober must come from a Higher Power … God as we understand Him.
This fact about our alcoholism also has broader application to the general conditions of life. There’s an almost endless list of conditions that are not humanly possible to change. Some of these conditions apply only to us; others, such as war and disease, cruelly afflict all of humankind. Looking at this sorry picture, many of us wish we had the power to apply Twelve Step principles to all human problems.
While we don’t have such power at the moment, we do have the power to take a spiritual view of all seemingly hopeless conditions. This includes trying to do whatever we can about any problem, while recognizing that the real solution must eventually come from a Higher Power. We must never lose hope that God will cork with us and through us to create a better world. In a small way, we can help by sharing what happened to us in our recovery from alcoholism. No human power could have relieved our alcoholism, but God could and did.
Though I live and work with people who may be frightened and cynical, I’ll hold to the idea that a Higher Power is working ceaselessly to improve the human condition in general. There is no reason why the miraculous healing power that relieved my alcoholism should not apply to other problems in my life.
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Keep It Simple
April 15
That day is lost on which one has not laughed.
–French proverb
For a long time, we didn’t really laugh. It’s surprising when we think about it: We hadn’t really laughed for so long . . . we almost forgot how good we could feel. It feels so good to laugh again!
Now our spirits come more alive each day. Now we feel what alcohol and other drugs stuffed deep inside us. Pain, fear and anger come up. But so do happiness and joy, thankfulness and a sense of humor. In early recovery, we work through the hard feelings. As we grow in the program, we have more and more room for happiness.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, wake me up to the joy and laughter that today holds for me. Don’t let me miss it!
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll spread some laughter. I will learn a joke and tell it to three people.
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Each Day a New Beginning
April 15
It seems to me that I have always been waiting for something better – sometimes to see the best I had snatched from me.
–Dorothy Reed Mendenhall
Gratitude for what is prepares us for the blessings just around the corner. What is so necessary to understand is that our wait for what’s around the corner closes our eyes to the joys of the present moment. We have only the 24 hours ahead of us. In fact, all we can be certain of having is the moment we are presently experiencing. And it is a gift to be enjoyed. There is no better gift just right for us than this moment, at this time.
We can, each of us, look back on former days, realizing that we learned too late the value of a friend or an experience. Both are now gone. With practice and a commitment to ourselves, we can learn to reap the benefits of today, hour by hour. When we detach from the present and wait for tomorrow, or next week, or look to next year, we are stunting our spiritual growth. Life can only bless us now, one breath at a time.
I can live in the present if I choose to. Gentle reminders are often necessary, however. I will step into my life, today. It can become a habit, one I will never want to break.
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Alcoholics Anonymous
April 15
LISTENING TO THE WIND – It took an “angel” to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.
After a year or so I became bored with my life in the islands and the guy I had been dating. I said goodbye to my waitress job and my family, and moved to California with my one-year-old son.
p. 461
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
April 15
Step Four – “Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.”
If, however, our natural disposition is inclined to self righteousness or grandiosity, our reaction will be just the opposite. We will be offended at A.A.’s suggested inventory. No doubt we shall point with pride to the good lives we thought we led before the bottle cut us down. We shall claim that our serious character defects, if we think we have any at all, have been caused chiefly by excessive drinking. This being so, we think it logically follows that sobriety– first, last, and all the time–is the only thing we need to work for. We believe that our one-time good characters will be revived the moment we quit alcohol. If we were pretty nice people all along, except for our drinking, what need is there for a moral inventory now that we are sober?
p. 45
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Xtra Thoughs
April 15
To give without any reward, or any notice, has a special quality of its own.
–Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Listen to your feelings. They tell you when you need to take care of yourself, like finding a friend if you feel lonely, crying if you feel sad, singing and smiling if you feel happy, and acting frisky if you feel good.
–Pat Palmer
Being happy doesn’t mean everything’s perfect, it just means you’ve decided to see beyond the imperfections.
–Unknown
“The spiritual journey, the path of recovery and personal growth, is a detoxification process in which we bring up and out the negative beliefs we have carried with us from the past and that now poison the present.”
–Marianne Williamson
“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out.”
–Art Linkletter
As long as you’re recreating yourself, why not start by simply being GLAD! to be alive?
–LUMPYSEZ
“He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.”
–Raymond Hull
“God doesn’t play dice.”
–Albert Einstein
God always leads us toward life.
–Gracie M. Willingham
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Father Leo’s Daily Meditation
April 15
SOLITUDE
“People who take time to be alone usually have depth, originality and quiet reserve.”
–John Miller
I need to be alone. I need time to listen to my thoughts, consider my opinions and strengthen my body. I need to pull away from my hectic life to be alone with me.
As a drinking alcoholic I hated to be alone. I became paranoiac about “leaving the fort” – today I accept that nobody is indispensable and that the world will still be there when I return from the desert!
Today I grow in the stillness of solitude. I can rest in that “still” part of me that is the essential me.
God is very close to me in the silence of self.
Lord, in the stillness of Your life, I am healed and rejuvenated.
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Bible Scriptures
April 15
“He who says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness until now.”
-1 John 2:9
“Whoever trusts in the Lord will be enriched.”
-Proverbs 28:25
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Daily Inspiration
April 15
Never give up on yourself because God never gives up on you. Lord, You forgive me. Who am I not to forgive myself, too?
God is always doing new things in our lives. Lord, help me to close the door to my past and take the time to notice and enjoy the newness I am experiencing right now.
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A Day At A Time
April 15
Reflection For The Day
Rare are the practicing alcoholics who have any idea how irrational they are, or, seeing their irrationality, can bear to face it. One reason is that they are abetted in their blindness by a world which doesn’t yet understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism. The dictionary defines sanity as “soundness of mind.” Yet no alcoholics, soberly analyzing his or her destructive behavior, can truly claim soundness of mind. Have I come to believe, as the Second Step suggests, that a Power greater than myself can restore me to sanity?
Today I Pray
May I see that my own behavior as a practicing alcoholic, a drug-user or a compulsive over-eater, could be described as “insane.” For those still actively addicted, admitting to “”insane” behavior is well-nigh impossible. I pray that I may continue to abhor the insanities and inanities of my addictive days. May others like me recognize their problems of addiction, find help in treatment and in The Program, and come to believe that a Higher Power can restore them to sanity.
Today I Will Remember
He restoreth my soul.
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One More Day
April 15
Just because everything is different doesn’t mean anything has changed.
– Irene Peter
Chance may happen gradually without our being aware of it. A sudden event may force us to recognize how different our lives have become. Yet even when the details or circumstances have changed, we may discover that the real meaning of our lives has remained the same.
We still carry many of the same values as before. We are thankful for the stable relationships that have grown as we have become stronger. We still strive to succeed in the goals we’ve set. We continue to look for — and to find — meaning in our life experiences. Certainly, we’ve changed and many things are different, but we continue to carry within ourselves the unique person we each are, the person we’ve always been.
I have always been a person capable of tremendous growth. I’m thankful that I can make changes that will help me grow.
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One Day At A Time
April 15
Success
I have begun everything with the idea that I could succeed, and I never had much patience with the multitudes of people who are always ready to explain why one cannot succeed. I have always had a high regard for the man who could tell me how to succeed.
–Booker T. Washington
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is my main source of inspiration when it comes to recovery issues. It’s proven to be a valuable asset to my program.
I’ve learned from the Big Book that recovery from any compulsive disease is possible. We are given Twelve Steps to follow, and told that if we do what our predecessors did, then we WILL recover. We have to be willing to go to any length to succeed. We have to do the footwork. The people who don’t succeed in this program are the ones who don’t avail themselves of all the help that’s available to them. They don’t read the literature, they don’t go to meetings, they don’t do service … they don’t do what those who have gone before have done. So they wallow in their disease instead of recovering.
There’s a reason why we’re told, “Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.” That means the program works IF you work it. Those who don’t work the program don’t recover. That’s a pretty powerful statement, but it’s true, and for some reason, a lot of compulsive people just don’t get it. They keep doing the same old things and getting the same old results. In the process, they remain fully in the grip of their disease. Sure, recovery is a miracle, but it won’t fall into your lap. You need to work for it, and by the grace of the God of your understanding, you’ll receive the miracle.
One Day at a Time …
I remember that it’s not enough to talk the talk; I need to walk the walk if I want to recover.
~ Jeff ~
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Elder’s Meditation of the Day
April 15
“When people live far from the scenes of the Great Spirit’s making, it’s easy for them to forget his laws.”
–Walking Buffalo, STONEY
Society today is way off track. Unfortunately, many Indian people are caught up in these modern times. The Elders are telling us we must wake up! We must come back to the culture because this is where His laws are. If we don’t follow these laws, we will be unhappy. We cannot do things just because everybody is doing them. This does not make it right. We must follow what the Great Spirit says we must do. We need to pray hard for the courage to come back and live according to the culture. It will be difficult at first but worth it in the end. We must teach our children the culture.
Great Spirit, today, let me listen to the warnings of the Elders.
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Journey To The Heart
April 15
Imagine What You Want
What do you want? What do you want to create in your life? What situation do you want to live in? Describe the scenario. Imagine it. We can often have what we want, but we rarely take the time to imagine it. And imagination is the first step toward creativity.
What do you want? What would it look like, feel like? Is what you’re working so hard on what you really want? That relationship? That job? That home? If it is, go for it. If it’s not, imagine and create something different.
Begin with imagination. Imagine what you really want in your mind, and you’ve taken the first step toward creating it. If you don’t know what you want, that’s okay too. Ask the universe for help. Ask God and the universe to bring you your highest good.
Ask the universe to help you create exactly what you want and need. Trust the universe, and you will be trusting an honorable and benevolent friend.
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Today’s Gift
April 15
If I have freedom in my life, And in my soul am free, Angels alone that soar above Enjoy such liberty.
—Richard Lovelace
When a cow decides to stop nursing her calf, she isn’t rejecting it. She knows it’s time for the calf to be on its own. Although the calf might feel rejected and puzzled at first, it soon adapts to its new independence and freedom.
When we feel rejected, it’s useful to remember that whatever has caused us to feel this way might have nothing to do with us. It might be a reflection of what’s happening with someone else, or just the end of a natural stage in life, as with the calf.
When we understand that others’ actions toward us come from their own feelings, and that we don’t cause their feelings any more than they control ours, we can free ourselves from a little bit of fear and self-hate. We can see what seems to be rejection as an open door, with our freedom on the other side.
What rejections have set me free?
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The Language of Letting Go
April 15
Communication
Part of owning our power is learning to communicate clearly, directly, and assertively. We don’t have to beat around the bush in our conversations to control the reactions of others. Guilt-producing comments only produce guilt. We don’t have to fix or take care of people with our words; we can’t expect others to take care of us with words either. We can settle for being heard and accepted. And we can respectfully listen to what others have to say.
Hinting at what we need doesn’t work. Others can’t read our mind, and they’re likely to resent our indirectness. The best way to take responsibility for what we want is to ask for it directly. And, we can insist on directness from others. If we need to say no to a particular request, we can. If someone is trying to control us through a conversation, we can refuse to participate.
Acknowledging feelings such as disappointment or anger directly, instead of making others guess at our feelings or having our feelings come out in other ways, is part of responsible communication. If we don’t know what we want to say, we can say that too.
We can ask for information and use words to forge a closer connection, but we don’t have to take people around the block with our conversations. We don’t have to listen to, or participate in, nonsense. We can say what we want and stop when we’re done.
Today, I will communicate clearly and directly in my conversations with others. I will strive to avoid manipulative, indirect, or guilt producing statements. I can be tactful and gentle whenever possible. And I can be assertive if necessary.
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More Language Of Letting Go
April 15
Say what you can’t have
“Why is it,” one man asked, “that if I walk into a room with one hundred women, the one I’m attracted to will either be engaged to someone else or live across the country? Will someone please explain that to me?”
I laughed when he asked the question, although he wasn’t trying to be funny. Many people find themselves enamored with what they can’t have. His question struck a cord because I’m one of them. Unavailability– and not being able to have what you want– although painful, can be deliciously enticing in many ways.
That miserable, deprived place feels so comfy and familiar to us. Even though we know where it leads– to letdown, loneliness, sitting by the phone– we’ll let that feeling lead us around by the nose.
Wanting what we can’t have is a universal dilemma. It’s so easy to conjure up fantasies about how delicious it would be if we could only have that, even though we know we never could. Then we don’t have to deal with what we have. And we don’t have to face issues like intimacy, commitment, and love.
Learn to recognize longing and yearning for what we can’t have. And ask for the courage and wisdom to learn about the true delights of available, requited love.
If we begin yearning for something we can’t have, we don’t have to take ourselves so seriously. We can see it for what it is and just enjoy a good laugh at ourselves.
God, help me stop sabotaging myself.
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Touchstones Meditations For Men
April 15
Just be what you are and speak from your guts and heart – it’s all a man has.
—Hubert Humphrey
Some of us have doubted our inner voice so completely that we abandoned it totally. Many of us have discovered in recovery that by our denial we had violated our inner voice with lies, even to ourselves. Now we question whether we can trust our instincts, and we may not know what we feel.
Masculine spiritual recovery is a return to our guts and our heart. Standing up and speaking from our hearts may be difficult at times, but our self-respect rises as we do. That is where we go for our final decision-making. We develop better reception for the inner voice as we live this program. We accept that we are never absolutely right. We continue with humility, knowing we may be wrong and listening to others and our Higher Power. Yet we must live with our choices.
I will seek the courage to be faithful to my own instincts.
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Daily TAO
April 15
COMPASSION
Once you’ve seen the face of god,
You see that same face on everyone you meet.
The true god has no face. The true Tao has no name. But we cannot identify with that until we are of a very high level of insight. Until then, the gods with faces and the Tao with names are still more worthy of veneration and study than the illusions of the world.
With long and sincere training, it is possible to see the face of god. Holiness is not about scientific objectivity. It is about a deep and clear recognition of the true nature of life. Your attitude toward your god will be different than anyone else’s god — divinity is a reflection of your own understanding. If you experience differs from others, that does not invalidate your sense of godliness. You will have no doubts after you have seen.
Knowing god is the source of compassion in our lives. We realize that our separation from others is artificial. We are neither separate from other people nor from Tao. It is only our own egotism that leads us to define ourselves as individuals. In fact, a direct experience of god is a direct experience of the utter universality of life. If we allow it to change our way of thinking, we will understand our essential oneness with all things.
How does god look? Once you see god, you will see that same face on every person you meet.
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Daily Zen
April 15
Of all good works, zazen comes first, for the merit of only one step into it surpasses that of erecting a thousand temples. Even a moment of sitting will enable you to free yourself from life and death, and your Buddha nature will appear of itself. Then all you do, perceive, think becomes part of the miraculous Tathagata-suchness.
– Meiho (1277–1350)
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Food for Thought
April 15
A Daily Reprieve
Through the grace of our Higher Power and by means of the OA program, we compulsive overeaters are given a daily reprieve from our disease. This reprieve, however, is dependent on our spiritual condition. If we do not stay in touch with our Higher Power and if we do not practice the OA principles each day, we lose the reprieve and fall into compulsive overeating.
Our program comes first; other concerns are secondary. OA is not something which we can tack on to our schedule when it is convenient. To be effective, it requires top priority. This does not mean that we spend all of our time involved in OA activities. It does mean that all of our activities are guided by spiritual principles.
Impossible? Only if we refuse to turn our lives over to our Higher Power. When He is in control, our work, recreation, and rest all come under His direction. We are spiritually in tune each day and safe from our disease.
Thank You for saving me from my disease today.
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In God’s Care
April 15
Life is God’s novel. Let him write it.
–Isaac Bashevis Singer
So many times we’ve had all our hopes pinned to the success of a specific plan for the day or a particular outcome to some episode in our daily drama. Too often we were certain that if we didn’t get our way, we’d be devastated. And just as often, God had other plans – for which we can now feel gratitude.
Most of us wouldn’t be here if we had authored the novel of our life. We would have gone too far in our pursuit of drugs, excitement, the “good life.” There’s little doubt we would have gone beyond our limits. Fortunately, God intervened, getting our life stories back on course while there were chapters yet to live.
Letting God be in charge of these remaining chapters as they unfold takes away our fear about what’s coming. We know God’s plan for us will take us where we need to go. We know that our purpose is still being fulfilled – or we wouldn’t be here. We know that God’s care will keep us safe. Our care for God and one another will keep us serene.
I’ll rest today and let God be in charge.
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Faith’s Check Book
April 15
Desires of Righteous Granted
The desires of the righteous shall be granted.
-Proverbs 10:24
Because it is a righteous desire it is safe for God to grant it. It would be neither good for the man himself, nor for society at large, that such a promise should be made to the unrighteous. Let us keep the Lord’s commands, and He will rightfully have respect to our desires.
When righteous men are left to desire unrighteous desires, they will not be granted to them. But then these are not their real desires; they are their wanderings or blunders, and it is well that they should be refused. Their gracious desires shall come before the Lord, and He will not say them nay.
Does the Lord deny us our requests for a time? Let the promise for today encourage us to ask again. Has He denied us altogether? We will thank Him still, for it always was our desire that He should deny us if He judged a denial to be best.
As to some things, we ask very boldly. Our chief desires are for holiness, usefulness, likeness to Christ, preparedness for heaven. These are the desires of grace rather than of nature—the desires of the righteous man rather than of the mere man. God will not stint us in these things but will do for us exceeding abundantly. “Delight thy self also in the Lord, and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” This day, my soul, ask largely!
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This Morning’s Meditation
April 15
“My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?”
-Psalm 22:1.
We here behold the Saviour in the depth of His sorrows. No other place so well shows the griefs of Christ as Calvary, and no other moment at Calvary is so full of agony as that in which His cry rends the air—”My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?” At this moment physical weakness was united with acute mental torture from the shame and ignominy through which He had to pass; and to make His grief culminate with emphasis, He suffered spiritual agony surpassing all expression, resulting from the departure of His Father’s presence. This was the black midnight of His horror; then it was that He descended the abyss of suffering. No man can enter into the full meaning of these words. Some of us think at times that we could cry, “My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?” There are seasons when the brightness of our Father’s smile is eclipsed by clouds and darkness; but let us remember that God never does really forsake us. It is only a seeming forsaking with us, but in Christ’s case it was a real forsaking. We grieve at a little withdrawal of our Father’s love; but the real turning away of God’s face from His Son, who shall calculate how deep the agony which it caused Him?
In our case, our cry is often dictated by unbelief: in His case, it was the utterance of a dreadful fact, for God had really turned away from Him for a season. O thou poor, distressed soul, who once lived in the sunshine of God’s face, but art now in darkness, remember that He has not really forsaken thee. God in the clouds is as much our God as when He shines forth in all the lustre of His grace; but since even the thought that He has forsaken us gives us agony, what must the woe of the Saviour have been when He exclaimed, “My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?”